


Take a Chance

by SigmaCreations



Category: Spooks | MI-5
Genre: Dinner, F/M, Requited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-13
Updated: 2011-12-13
Packaged: 2018-06-06 09:24:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6748207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SigmaCreations/pseuds/SigmaCreations
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An alternative ending for the scene in which Ros confronts Harry about her father and Ruth comforts him. This was the first fic I ever wrote, and having gone back to read it again, I was inspired to tweak it a little as I found it somewhat lacking in detail. All characters belong to Kudos. Reviews are very much appreciated. Cheers, S.C.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take a Chance

Ruth saw him through the glass wall of his office as Ros left. He was sitting on the edge of his desk, his left arm crossed across his chest, and his right covering his face, looking so dejected that she couldn't help going over to offer him comfort. She slid open the office door, murmuring, "Hi," and smiling at him tentatively.

"Hi," he replied in a defeated voice as he slowly turned to look at her, his gaze so incredibly sad.

Slowly, she walked over to him and said, "I just wanted to say, about Ros... that you were right. It isn't your fault, Harry."

A myriad of emotions flashed through his eyes in that moment, and she felt quite powerless to move. "Thank you," he said simply.

His warm, hazel eyes held hers captive for long moments, and she had to struggle to break eye contact. She glanced quickly down and then back up at his face before whispering a quiet goodnight. His eyes were soft as he watched her, shinning with a mixture of gratitude and pain, and she hated leaving him like this, but she could already feel her resolve to stay away from him weakening by the second. He was like the sun drawing her toward him with his strong gravitational force, and she was so very scared that she'd simply melt away if she got too close. And yet, he looked so very sad just now that, before she knew what she was doing, her hand was resting on his left forearm and squeezing it slightly in silent support.

Realising what she was doing, she quickly began to turn away when she felt his warm hand covering hers. "Don't go," she heard him say, and the gentleness of his tone was enough to stop her in her tracks. She looked back into his eyes, and what she saw there, took her breath away. He looked so vulnerable all of a sudden, like a little, lost boy. "Please," he said, his voice and eyes begging her to stay with him a little longer.

Ruth couldn't move. This was not the Harry she was accustomed to, the one who was always sure of himself, always confident. She had never seen him so vulnerable before, so open, so trusting. There were no barriers there and it warmed her heart to see it, to know that he trusted her enough to lay himself open to her like this. And she found herself wondering why this was the case and suddenly knew with a certain clarity that, if anyone else had been standing in her place right now, he'd have shut down his emotions and built a wall around himself in an instant. Which meant that he trusted her so much more than she ever realised, so much more than she trusted him.

"She's right, you know," he finally said. "My personal life _is_ a disaster."

"Harry-" she began to object, but he interrupted her.

"My children hardly speak to me, I live alone in a house without warmth that I hardly spend any time in," he continued, "and then... there's us."

"Harry, please," she begged, starting to pull away from him, knowing how vulnerable she was now after seeing him like this, knowing how hard it would be to remain strong and not give in to him.

"I'm in love with you, Ruth," he stated.

She froze and stared at him, thinking that perhaps she'd misheard. In love with her? She knew he had a weakness for her, admired her, desired her, trusted her, but could his feelings extend as deep as love?

"I have been for some years now, almost from the very first day you arrived on the Grid," he continued sadly. "And what have I managed to do about it?" he shrugged his shoulders and sighed. He looked down at the floor, his whole body language dejected, and she didn't trust herself to speak.

  


  


_How could he have got everything so wrong? It wasn't easy to make enough time for your personal life when you were a spook, but it wasn't as if he hadn't tried to make it work. Especially with her. The knowledge that he might have prevented this sorry state of affairs if he'd given his security officer a warning, if he'd done something to stop the gossip was tormenting him day and night, and knowing that she was in love with him and yet unwilling to take a chance on him hurt so very much. Shaking his head at himself slightly, he made an effort to get his emotions under control again. This wasn't going to solve anything._

_He looked up at Ruth and noticed that she was staring at him in disbelief. "Didn't you know?" he asked sadly._

_"I..." she began and then stopped as if unsure of what to say._

_He used his right hand to lift her hand from his arm and pulled her gently toward him. She wasn't expecting it and she stumbled, so he quickly placed his hands on her hips to steady her. She was standing in front of him now, their eyes at the same level as he was still sitting on the edge of his desk, and she looked so very beautiful, her stormy blue eyes searching his gaze, looking for confirmation that he wasn't lying, that he really did feel so strongly about her._

  


  


She saw the change in his eyes. All the vulnerability was gone now and he was looking at her like he had two nights ago in Havensworth, his eyes intense and hungry. The spell was broken and she felt overwhelmed by the mixture of desire and panic that rose up inside her, making her insides melt and her heart hammer rapidly in her chest. She tried to take a step back, to put some distance between them so she could clear her head and think, but he held her fast with his strong hands. She could feel the heat emanating from his body, his warm breath across her face, and she felt sure that his hands would leave a permanent mark on her hips, such was the scalding intensity of his touch.

"Harry," she protested as she struggled for control, and placing her hands on his chest, she pushed in a desperate last effort to move away from him before she melted or drowned... or both.

He slowly slid his hands up her sides, over her waist, along her rib cage, bringing them forward to caress the sides of her breasts, then up over her shoulders to her neck and finally up to cup her face. An involuntary moan escaped her as a shiver ran down her spine and her fingers flexed against his chest, but her hands were no longer pushing. She just glimpsed a smile on his lips before he leant forward and their lips connected. His lips were soft and gentle as he kissed her, again and again, and she felt her eyelids slide shut, her mind go blank, and her whole body turn to jelly. When his tongue slid along her lips, coaxing them to part and let him in, she resisted at first, but she couldn't keep it up for long as the heat blazing in the pit of her stomach began spreading through her veins like wildfire. His thumbs were caressing her cheeks, his lips kissing her, his tongue stroking her, the assault on her senses complete and irresistible, so that any rational thought that might interfere was pushed resolutely to the side, and with a sigh of total capitulation, she slid her hands under his jacket, behind his back, taking a step forward and pressing her body up against his as she parted her lips.

  


  


_He felt her give in to him, and he groaned as he deepened their kiss, moving his hands, his left to her soft, chestnut hair, and his right to the small of her back as he pulled her even closer. His tongue delved into her hot, moist mouth, exploring, tasting her for the first time and feeling her respond eagerly to his touch, bringing her tongue forward to meet his. Gently, she brushed her tongue against his, their first touch timid and light, the pleasure exploding inside him as she came back for more, became bolder and firmer, nudging, rubbing, pushing against him and making him moan. Next she took his lower lip between her teeth and pulled gently, sucking on it and stroking it with her tongue before releasing it again. He felt jolts of pleasure travel through his body and his arousal grow, the passion that was flaring inside her pushing him nearer to the limits of his self-control. He'd known she could be passionate in her defence of what's just, what's right, but this... this was incredible._

_Dimly he was aware of his surroundings. They were in his office he remembered. Not really the right place for sex, but at the back of his mind was the worry that, if he stopped now, Ruth might not consent to continue in a different location. Her rational mind would most likely sabotage them again, and this felt so very good, so very right that he didn't want it to end. So he allowed himself to enjoy their kissing a little longer, hanging onto his self-control with increasing difficulty, but as she slid her hands under his shirt and stroked his bare skin, he realised that he was getting too close to the edge; they_ must _find a more appropriate place right away. So he traced the line of her jaw with kisses and nibbled on her ear lobe before whispering in her ear, “Come with me, Ruth. I'll drive you home."_

_She sighed and dropped her forehead against his shoulder, her palms pressing firmly against his bare back as she hummed in response. He wasn't sure if that was a yes or a no, but he didn't press her for an answer, knowing that they both needed to bring their raging desire under control first._

  


  


Harry was holding her against his broad chest, his arms linked loosely behind her back, her body leaning against his, her face buried in his shoulder. He smelled so good, a mixture of his cologne and his masculine scent from working hard all day, and she found herself wishing that this moment would never end. Their breathing, heavy at first, began to slow as they relaxed, enjoying the contact, but as their passion drained away, her doubts returned and she was able to think clearly once more.

What was she doing? Isn't this exactly what she'd decided and told him she wouldn't do? How could she have let herself respond to him like that? Was she really so weak that she couldn't resist him? He'd said that he'd take her home. And then what? She knew what he wanted, what he expected after her shameless response to his advances just now, and it made her even more disgusted with herself. So much for being a good spook, for exercising her self-control and self-denial. Ten minutes in his company and she was ready to let him take her on his desk! And now, if she gave him want he wanted, what they both craved so very desperately, then what would happen? She was surprised to find herself even considering the possibility. Imagine what Malcolm, Adam and Jo would say if they knew! But what if they never found out, she found herself thinking. Harry could be discrete, she could be discrete, Harry's security officer would certainly be discrete after the bollocking she was sure he'd received over his last transgression. Could she afford to do what Harry wished? And, on the other hand, could she afford not to? It felt so very, very good in his arms, and she could well imagine how unbelievably amazing making love with him would be. She shivered at the thought and lifted her head to look at him. His eyes were so very warm, content, and full of love as he smiled at her that she couldn't help smiling back. Now that he'd admitted his feeling for her, she could see it so clearly in his gaze. He wasn't lying. He really did love her. Harry Pearce was in love with her! She almost squealed in delight, until she remembered that she'd refused to date him, refused to let herself become involved in a personal relationship with him. She didn't know that to do, so she decided to delay the decision. She'd let him drive her home. "I'll get my things," she said and walked back to her desk, straightening her clothes as she went.

A couple of minutes later, they were both ready to go. They went through the pods together, down the hall to the lifts, through the garage, and finally, they got into Harry's car. They drove in silence, both of them deep in thought. Ruth was trying to decide what she should do. Should she invite him in? Should she not? She just couldn't make up her mind now that she knew how spectacularly good he was at kissing and feeling certain that he'd be even better in bed. And yet the circumstances hadn't really changed much since last week when she'd refused to date him. Everyone would still lose all respect for the two of them, seeing her as the one who's screwing the boss to get ahead and him as the despicable man who's using his position of authority to get it on with his pretty and much younger employee. And when it ended? What would she do then? As they got nearer to their destination, the negative began to outweigh the positive in her mind, and she eventually came to the conclusion that she'd better not ask him in. She just wasn't brave enough to risk everything, her heart, her job, the respect of her colleagues and friends.

He pulled up in front of her house and got out of the car, swiftly coming round to the passenger door and holding it open for her. "Thank you," she said shyly and he nodded, falling in step beside her and following her up to her front door. She'd sensed that he wouldn't make it easy for her to reject him this time; he was going to stay close to her, and given half a chance, he'd attempt to seduce her. He'd already tried giving her space and trying to talk to her, but so far, only physical contact had worked to break down the barriers she'd erected around herself. The realization that he'd found her weakness scared and thrilled her at the same time. She wasn't scared of _him_ ; she knew that he would never force himself on her, but she also knew him well enough to realise that he wasn't about to back down without a fight this time. His jaw was set and she'd glimpsed the determined look in his eyes. He was going to use every weapon he possessed to convince her that they could be so good together, that she should give them a chance.

Taking a deep steadying breath in preparation to withstand his assault, she unlocked the door and turned toward him, but as she looked into his eyes, she could see the resignation in his gaze and knew that he was expecting a rejection. It was a shock to find how well he knew her, and in that moment, she felt an overpowering urge to take the leap, to let him into her home and her heart so that he could know her better, so that she could feel again all those wonderful emotions and sensations that his kiss had evoked inside her and to hell with the consequences. She craved, needed to be close to him, even, if in the end, it brought her more heartache.

"Would you like to come in?" she asked softly.

  


  


_She'd surprised him. He'd expected her to reject him, fight him, and even close the door in his face, and he'd prepared himself to do battle with every seductive technique in his arsenal in order to get through her front door where they could talk and spend some time together in private, where he might show her how much she means to him and the lengths that he's prepared to go to in order to be given a chance at a relationship with her._

_He blinked in surprise and felt the happiness closely followed by desire flood his mind. He smiled, and stepping forward, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, burying his face in her hair and pressing soft kisses against her neck. He heard her giggle and exclaim, "Hold your horses, Harry!"_

" _Impossible," he murmured in her ear as he held her close, continuing to slide his fingers through her hair and softly kiss her neck, her jaw, her ear. She shivered, but managed to open the door with her right hand._

_A cat appeared on the doorstep, mewing pathetically, and started wrapping itself around their legs. “Hello, Fidget," Ruth said, and he felt her push him gently but firmly away as she added, "He's hungry. I need to feed him, Harry."_

_He took a deep breath as he released her, inwardly swearing at the bloody cat as he followed her into the house. Once inside, he closed the door, and copying her, he hung up his coat and removed his shoes, placing them neatly beside hers. Then he followed Ruth and the cat into the kitchen. He watched her wash her hands, get some cat food out and put it in the cat's dish while the animal wrapped itself round and round her ankles as she told him to be patient and asked him where his sister was. He smiled as he watched her, delighted to find out that she speaks to her cat as he does with his dog._

“ _Here you go, Fidget,” she murmured softly as she placed the food and water on the floor, stroking the cat once from head to tail before straightening up. Fidget began to gulp down his food, purring in contentment, and was shortly joined by another cat, presumably his sister. “Why hello, Cleopatra,” she smiled and reached down to stroke her. “Nice of you to join us.” She turned then and spotted him watching her, so she blushed and said, “Crazy cat lady. I bet you're sorry you came in now.”_

“ _On the contrary,” he smiled, “I was just thinking that it makes me feel much better about chatting away to my dog every day.”_

_She smiled and replied, “We make quite a pair - crazy cat lady and barmy dog man.”_

_He chuckled softly and murmured, “That's a match made in heaven if ever I saw one.”_

_Her eyes widened in surprise and she blushed further, dropping her eyes to the cats once more. He was just contemplating what his next move should be, when the cat, Cleopatra, bolted from the kitchen, having helped Fidget polish off the last of the food, and distracted him for a moment._

“ _Would you like some wine?" she asked, drawing his attention back to her._

“ _Yes, please," he replied._

“ _Red or white?" she inquired._

“ _Whatever you're having," he answered and watched as she turned toward the fridge._

“ _How about some lasagne?" she asked again from behind the fridge door. "There's some left over from yesterday. It always tastes better on the second day."_

“ _Thank you," he said, suddenly realising that he was ravenous._

_He watched her move about the kitchen getting the food and wine ready, admiring the grace of her movements. He could get used to this, he thought. It had been so long since anyone had taken an interest in his well being, since he'd shared his life with someone. “Can I help?" he asked._

“ _Would you open the wine?" she replied from behind a cupboard door. "The cork screw's in the second drawer down,” she added pointing vaguely toward the opposite counter._

_Harry moved around the counter and washed his hands at the sink. Then he located the drawer, pulled it open, and found the cork screw. He was about to close it when he felt her hand on his waist and froze in surprise. She reached round him and grabbed a serving spoon from the open draw, before turning to look up at him and smiling as she murmured, “Thanks."_

_He held her gaze for a few seconds as a feeling of exquisite bliss settled over his heart at the domesticity of the situation, but when she reached up and kissed his cheek, he was momentarily stunned. The gesture was so unexpected and yet so natural at the same time that he stood frozen on the spot and unconsciously lifted his hand to his cheek._

“ _The wine won't open itself you know," Ruth laughed, snapping him out of his reverie._

_He suddenly realised that he'd been standing in the same spot while the seconds were ticking by and he felt rather foolish. “Sorry," he murmured and set about opening and pouring the wine._

  


  


They sat down at the table and began their meal.

"This is very good," Harry said. "Did you make it?"

"Yes," she replied with a smile. "I like to cook. I find it relaxing, but I don't often have time to do it. I usually cook a lot at the weekend and freeze the food in portions."

"I remember," he answered with a nod. "You made some lovely meals for me when I'd been suspended. I don't think I ever thanked you for them. Is it too late to thank you now? I really did appreciate them at the time."

"My pleasure," Ruth said with a blush.

Fidget appeared just then, mewing pathetically again until she pulled her chair back a little and allowed him to jump onto her lap where he curled up and began to purr loudly, making Harry laugh. “Sorry,” she explained. “He always sits on my lap while I have my dinner.”

“That's quite all right,” he smiled. “Scarlet always sits across from me and stares at me while I eat, so I think you have the better deal. It's rather disconcerting when she follows the motion of my fork with her eyes from the plate to my mouth and back again.”

“That can't be very relaxing,” she laughed.

“I'm used to it now,” he shrugged, “but when she first started to do it, it was rather unnerving. I never did manage to cure her of the habit.”

“So what else do you like to do in your free time, Harry?” she asked after a moment's silence. “Other than talk to Scarlet, that is.”

“Well,” he smiled, “I do enjoy music as you know, reading, mostly non-fiction, walking, usually with Scarlet, cricket, rugby, tennis and snooker, though I mostly watch those on the telly nowadays... um... poker-”

“Poker?” she interrupted. “I didn't realise you gamble, Harry.”

“Life's a gamble, Ruth,” he shrugged, but seeing her worried frown, he added, “Don't worry. I'm pretty good at it and I know when to stop.”

“I've never understood the appeal,” she replied with a thoughtful expression.

“It's the same as any op, Ruth,” he smiled. “The excitement, the deceit, the adrenaline rush.”

“I get plenty of that at work, thank you very much,” she replied, taking another sip of her wine.

“I don't any more,” he confessed. “Not since I moved up to Section Head.”

“But don't you worry about getting in too deep?”

“I always stick to the limit I've set for myself, no matter how tempting the offer or how good my hand is,” he explains. “So, no, I don't worry about that.”

“I suppose you do have an awful lot of self-control,” she nodded thoughtfully, “and I bet you're very good at it. You can control your emotions and facial expressions so completely. That time when I accused you of killing Princess Diana...” She smiled and shook her head as she twirled her glass around with her fingers. “You really had me going for a few minutes there.”

He laughed and replied, “That was the idea. Payback for doubting me.” She blushed at his words and he dropped his voice to a husky whisper as he added, “But you have no idea how close I came to losing my self-control in that corridor, Ruth.”

She swallowed and her eyes darted up to his as he leant closer. His eyes were so warm and dark, and she could see the desire smouldering in their depths. And she wanted him, _really_ wanted him so very badly in that moment, but she was so scared of what would happen afterwards... What would she do if it only ended up being a one-night-stand, or a month long affair? Was that better than nothing? And what about work? How would they continue to work together if they broke up?

“What scares you, Ruth?” he asked softly as he reached for her hand and covered it gently with his own. “Is it me? Do I scare you?”

“No,” she shook her head as she looked down at their joined hands.

“That's good,” he murmured. “What then? Perhaps you think I'm only after one thing?”

She shook her head again and whispered, “I don't think that, Harry. Not any more.”

“Good,” he said, “because I have too much respect... and love for you to do that. All I want is to spend time with you, Ruth... like this, like we're doing now. I love to be with you... but what we have at work is no longer enough for me. I want more... I _want_ everything... and I want it to last... forever.”

Her head snapped up to look at him at his last words. Bloody hell!

“Obviously,” he murmured softly, “I have no idea if it'll work out, but I want to try, Ruth. Please give me a chance... I can be discrete; no one will know... and if somewhere down the line things go pear shaped, I give you my word that I'll do everything in my power to make our interaction at work as painless for you as possible.”

His thumb was stoking the back of her hand and his warm, hazel eyes looking at her adoringly as he waited patiently for her decision. She felt such a deep longing for him then, a deep need to find out one way or the other if they could make it work, so she plucked up her courage and said, “You know, I _really_ wanted you to kiss me in that corridor, Harry... and I'd _really_ like it if you kissed me now.”

He smiled and murmured her name softly as he reached for her, pressing his lips gently against her own when she leant forward, pulling him closer. She shifted her legs round to face him, knocking Fidget off her lap in the process and making him protest rather loudly at being disturbed. The nerves she was feeling as a result of agreeing to give him a chance surfaced then, and she began to laugh at her cat's indignation and had to pull back, murmuring an apology to Harry in between bouts of giggles.

“That wasn't quite the reaction I was hoping for,” he grumbled, “but I'm sure my bruised ego will recover... eventually.” She sobered immediately at his hurt tone and apologised again, looking contrite and worried, but she soon realised that he was teasing her when he added with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, “Don't worry, Ruth. It'll take a lot more than a territorial cat to get rid of me now.”

She narrowed her eyes, eliciting a smile from him that was partly hidden behind his wine glass as he took a sip of the ruby red liquid. She watched him as he lowered the glass to the table and lifted the bottle, topping up their glasses. Then taking a sip of her wine, she smiled sweetly and said, “You'd better watch out, Harry, or I might change my mind and send you home _before_ the morning.”

He stared at her, looking stunned by the implication of her statement, but she pretended not to notice, fighting to keep her blush at bay as she turned to finish up her food. She was feeling rather smug and triumphant in addition to experiencing a fluttering of nervous excitement in her belly and a feeling of utter shock at her daring. She'd just invited Harry, albeit a little obliquely, to spend the night with her! Where the hell had that come from?! Well, actually, she knew where it had come from, but what had possessed her to voice that particular thought? She didn't usually invite men to spend the night until she'd been on several dates with them. Then again, after three years of working in close proximity and in very stressful situations with him, she knew Harry better than most men she'd ever had a relationship with. And she wanted him so very much.

She glanced up at him and found him watching her, his eyes cautious and yet full of hope, and she couldn't help smiling at him. He was so adorable at times like this, when he was unsure of where he stood with her. His gaze softened and he grinned, looking so very happy all of a sudden, like a little boy confronted with a room full of Christmas presents, and it felt so good to know that _she_ was the cause of his joy.

Smiling shyly at him again, she got up and began to clear the dishes from the table, taking them to the sink and leaving them there to soak. When she turned towards him again, he was standing, holding their wine glasses, still smiling happily at her. She took a few steps toward him, accepting the glass he offered out to her and murmuring, “Come through to the sitting room.”

He nodded and followed her though, taking a seat on the sofa and patting the spot next to him, saying, "Sit by me, Ruth." Before she could take up his offer, however, Fidget jumped up onto the spot Harry had just indicated, and purring loudly, he curled up against Harry's side. Ruth burst out laughing at the look on Harry's face.

"Right," he declared with an angry frown, "that settles it."

He stood up, earning an offended look from Fidget, and taking the glass of wine from Ruth's hand, he set both glasses on the table. Then he took Ruth by the hand and started to walk towards the stairs. Ruth was still chuckling as she followed him, and was feeling very grateful for the distraction Fidget had caused as she would have been very nervous otherwise. It had taken a lot of courage to get to this point this evening.

Then just as they got to the foot of the stairs, a grey blur shot past them up the stairs, making Harry scowl as he began to march upstairs with Ruth behind him, her hand still clasped tightly in his. At the top, he looked round at Ruth who was trying hard to keep a straight face, and when she saw the grumpy look on his face, it nearly set her off laughing again. She nodded to the left, not trusting herself to speak, and had to swallow hard as the glare he directed at her almost had her in stitches again. Turning around, he pushed open the door she'd just indicated and entered the room, followed close behind by Ruth.

  


  


_The infernal cat was curled up on the bed, purring contentedly, and Ruth took one look at it and doubled over with laughter._

_"_ _Out," he demanded and moved stealthily toward the cat, picking it up gently and cradling it in his arms before he carried it to the door. He set it down carefully and whispered, "My turn tonight, mate," before giving it a gentle shove onto the landing and closing the door behind it._

_When he turned around, he caught Ruth watching him. All traces of laughter were gone from her face, but her eyes were dancing with a mixture of joy and tenderness. It had been a very long time since a woman had looked at him like that, and it made his heart ache for her._

_"_ _Deep down you're just a big softy, aren't you?" she said gently._

_He slowly closed the distance between them and lifted his hands to stroke her arms, smiling down at her as he said huskily,_ _"_ _So... you've seen through my disguise."_

_She grinned at him then, her whole face lighting up and her cheeks creasing into dimples as she reached her arms up over his shoulders and pressed her lips to his, and with a groan of deep longing, he pulled her close and deepened the kiss, their hot breaths mingling as they explored each other thoroughly, their breathing heavy, their pulses racing, their hearts overflowing with love._

  


  


_**Next morning** _

  


_Harry heard the phone ring and reached out to pick it up, but his hand found something warm and soft instead. Disoriented he opened his eyes and lifted his head to look around. His brain had time to register that he wasn't in his room before his gaze fell on Ruth, sleeping peacefully beside him. He smiled as memories of last night flooded his mind, filling him with a joy he hadn't known the likes of before._

_The phone rang again, and easing himself out of bed so as not to wake her, he quickly located his trousers on the floor and pulled it out of his pocket. Then silencing it, he opened the bedroom door and went out onto the landing, managing to catch Fidget who'd made a dash for Ruth's bedroom the moment the door opened. He took the cat with him into the bathroom and sat down on the edge of the bathtub, placing him in his knees and stoking him while he answered the phone._

_"Yes," he said somewhat impatiently, listened for a moment and then relied, "I'll be there in one hour... No, I can't get there before then... Yes." He ended the call with a sign, and turning to Fidget who was purring loudly, he said, "Well, Fidget, let's get us some breakfast."_

_He put the cat down and opened the door, watching with a smile as he darted quickly down the stairs to the kitchen. Perhaps he knew what breakfast meant, he mused as he creped back into the bedroom, retrieved his clothes and quickly got dressed. He stood by the bed for a moment, looking down at Ruth as she slept, marvelling at how beautiful she was and feeling his desire rekindle at the sight of her. If only the Home Secretary's office hadn't called just now, he thought with a mixture of longing and frustration. What he wouldn't give to be able to just crawl back into bed with her and make love until lunchtime. He stifled a sigh and forced himself to look away, turning and quietly exiting the room before going downstairs._

_He fed the cats and made an omelet, toast and tea for breakfast, whistling happily as he moved about the kitchen and chatted to the animals. They'd already finished their breakfast, and the shy one, Cleopatra, had climbed up onto the topmost cabinet and was peering down at him warily. Fidget was giving himself a bath, lying on the floor in the patch of warm sunshine that came in through the window. He smiled at him and said, “You look like you've got it all figured out there, Fidget.” The cat turned his head to look at him, almost as if he'd understood what had been said, making Harry chuckle. “I don't blame you, mate. Before last night, I'd have swapped lives with you without a second thought, now however... let's just say I think I have the better deal when it comes to your mistress.” He turned to look up at Cleopatra again, adding, “You know, you could come down too. You don't look very comfortable up there, and I assure you, I don't bite.” The cat, however, just watched him with her big green eyes, so he shrugged and said, “Suit yourself,” before turning back to flip the eggs. “I suppose it's a good sign that you'll at least stay in the same room as me now. Does it have anything to do with the fact that I gave you your breakfast this morning?” he asked as he slid the eggs onto two plates alongside the toast. He found a tray and arranged everything on it, smiling in contentment as he looked at his handiwork; it felt so good to be making breakfast for two again. Then murmuring his excuses to the cats, he left the kitchen and carried the breakfast upstairs. When he entered the room this time, Ruth stirred._

  


  


She opened her eyes and saw Harry walking towards her with a breakfast tray. Last night came flooding back, and she smiled at him as she felt a warm tingling sensation travel through her at the memories. "Wow!" she exclaimed, "Breakfast in bed. That hasn't happened to me in years!"

"Glad to hear it," he replied possessively. "I hope you like eggs."

"Thank you," she said sitting up and pulling the covers up over her chest.

He placed the tray on her lap, and grabbing his plate and tea from it, he sat down in the chair by the window. It was good to have him here, she realised as she watched him take a sip of his tea. She'd always thought that it would be strange for them to be a couple, that the normal things in life would feel odd, but this didn't; it felt wonderful.

“You're not eating,” he commented as he watched her over the rim of his mug.

“I will,” she smiled. “I was just thinking... You look good in my bedroom.”

He lowered his mug and grinned at her, his warm, hazel eyes sparkling at her in adoration. “Does this mean you'd like me to come back again?”

“Oh, yes,” she nodded, feeling her cheeks heat up even as she tried to control the blush. “Definitely. As often as possible, I'd say. In fact... I think you'd look much better in bed.”

"I have to go in a few minutes," he sighed. "I have to check on Scarlet and give her some food and water, poor thing, and then I have to see the Home Secretary."

She tried to hide her disappointment and said, "Okay," in what she hoped was her normal voice.

He smiled warmly at her as their gazes held and they shared a few moments of companionable silence. She wished that he could stay longer this morning, that they had time to be together for a little while before the outside world intruded once more, but they both knew that such opportunities would be rare and far between. Harry was needed at work very early on most mornings.

"I fed your cats," he said after a bit.

"Thank you," she replied. "You _are_ a useful man to have around."

The big grin he gave her in reward had her smiling like a fool.

  


  


_They finished their breakfast, and he walked over to the bed and picked up the tray, setting it down on the floor and taking a seat on the edge of the bed. Then he let his eyes roam over her face for several moments, marvelling once more at her beauty and the fact that she'd agreed to give them a change. Then lifting his hand to her face, he pushed a strand of stray hair back behind her ear as he murmured, “You won't change you mind, will you?”_

“ _About what?” she asked._

“ _This,” he replied softly. “Us.”_

“ _No,” she shook her head. “I want this to work, Harry... as much as you do. Just promise me, we won't let them find out... at the Grid.”_

“ _We're spooks, Ruth,” he smiled. “We're good at keeping secrets, and I actually think that it'll be easier now. At least, it will be for me. I won't need to watch you so much at work when I know I'll be getting my fill when we're alone together.”_

_He watched her smile shyly at his statement, but then she frowned slightly and said, “Away from the Grid though. No stolen moments on the Grid, even when we're alone. Okay?”_

“ _I rather enjoyed our moment yesterday, Ruth,” he grinned, but seeing her worried frown, he added, “But I promise not to repeat that in the future... unless you ask me to.”_

“ _Thank you,” she murmured, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it gently._

 _He smiled and lent in close, softly kissing her lips. He'd planned on kissing her just once and pulling away, but he found that, once he'd started, he couldn't stop. His hands were pulling her close now, and as he felt her respond without restraint to his advances, he began to lose himself in her._ " _Oh, Ruth," he groaned as he bent over her, kissing her passionately, his whole body aroused as he pulled her close, and it felt so very good that he didn't want to stop, he never wanted it to end._

_Soon he felt her push against his chest gently, but firmly, and heard her say, "Harry. Go. You'll be late." So very reluctantly and with superhuman effort, he pulled himself away._

_He was breathing hard and felt a little dazed._ " _Bloody hell!" he groaned as he shook his head to clear it, and when he glanced at Ruth, he noticed the self-satisfied smile on her lips._ " _Happy are we?" he said sarcastically, feeling irritated with his inability to control himself suddenly._

" _Mmmm," she relied, "very." She paused and then added, "Now go. We can continue this later."_

 _He smiled at her, his irritation forgotten at the knowledge that she wanted him, and murmured, “I'll hold you to that, Miss Evershed.” Then he stood up, and picked up the tray, he headed for the door. In the doorway, he paused to take one last look at her, his beautiful, sexy, passionate lover, wanting to keep the image of her clad in nothing but the duvet, her hair adorably tousled, her lips smiling softly at him, her eyes adoring, in his mind for ever._ " _See you on the Grid," he said._

_"Yes,_ _" she smiled._

  


  


A little while later, Ruth got up and began to get ready for the day. Her thoughts kept drifting back to the night before and it made her want to sing and dance in joy. She was in a relationship with _Harry_! She could scarcely believe it. She'd wanted this for so long, dreamed of it with such longing, wished for it so desperately... and it felt so good to have finally let it happen. God, how she hoped that it would last. She'd never loved anyone quite this much before and she couldn't bear the thought of it coming to an end. Sternly she told herself to stop thinking like that. She shouldn't be worrying about the end of the relationship when it had only just began. So gathering the last of her things and making sure the cats had what they needed, she determinedly put aside her worries and focused on her joy.

When she left the house half an hour later, she had to work hard to suppress her euphoria as she walked to the tube. This would never do! Someone at work was bound to notice. Fortunately, she suddenly remembered something else that served to sober her a little. She and Harry hadn't used any kind of contraception last night. She thought about going to the doctor and getting the morning after pill, but to her surprise, she found that part of her didn't want to. The night had been so wonderfully perfect, and there was only a very small chance that she would get pregnant anyway as she'd never been particularly fertile, and she felt that, if she did conceive, their baby would be a blessing that she wouldn't exchange for anything in the world. As she walked down the road, she debated with herself that to do, going back and forth for a while before deciding to play it safe and see the doctor later today as she realised that she had to consider the strain a baby would put on her new relationship with Harry. After all, she had no idea if he wanted more children, and even if he did, it was too soon for that now. At the tube station, however, something happened that drove the problem completely out of her mind. A man committed suicide and her life fell apart.


End file.
